Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Three Times a Lady

I was lying awake in bed last night (the reason involved the dog and her diarrhea all over my kitchen floor - I'll spare you the details but tell you just enough to make you feel for me. lol!).

Anyway, I was lying awake in bed last night and for some reason I started to think about my prom night.

I was a bit of a quiet, quiet geek in high school. It really was a miracle I even went to prom honestly.

And what's funny is that I don't really remember much of high school at all. I don't know if I forgot it, or if I just kept my head down and my mouth shut enough that I just really didn't do much memory making, or if I really am just a bit of a space cadet.

It's probably a bit of all three.

I really was quite clueless in high school *cough, my whole life, cough* and in all honesty muddled my way through. I never dated, I only had a few friends, and aside from choir and drama I wasn't involved in much. When prom time came around, of course I wanted to go, and of course I had my ideas of who I wanted to go with, but there was no way I was going to ask anyone and it was certain that no one was going to ask me.

One of my good friends at the time, Paula, had heard one day that our class president (very popular and quite handsome) was suddenly single and without a date. I knew him; I guess I would have called him a "friend" though we really didn't speak much beyond the few classes we had together and we never hung out. Not that I ever hung out with anyone beyond my immediate circle of friends anyway.

I don't know how she did it, what strings she pulled, what favors she promised, but before I knew it she told me I had a prom date (we were going "as friends"). He never officially asked me, (at least not that I remember) so it really was a stupid thing for me to trust what she said and think that he and I would actually attend prom together.

Paula and I went with my mom to shop for dresses. I hated every minute of it. We couldn't afford much, so finding something that actually fit AND that was actually long enough was quite the challenge. I ended up with a little blue number, mainly just because it fit - not because I particularly liked it. Typical for the time (1992) it had slightly puffy sleeves and sequins from top to bottom. It wasn't really my style, but never having shopped for formal dresses before, I really didn't know what to look for or even where to go. Paula also took me to have my shoes dyed and pick out a matching purse. A week or so later when I picked up the shoes, I realized that the store had accidentally put a purse in the box with them. The purse had been dyed to match someone else's blue shoes, and apparently they slipped it into the wrong box. It was slightly off color from my shoes, and being dumb and young I let Paula convince me to keep the purse, but also to go back to the store and see if they would correct the color "mistake". Well, of course when we went in there and they saw the purse (which they were obviously missing) they accused us of stealing it and wouldn't give it back. Paula tried to argue while I looked on wide eyed and terrified, and after a couple of failed arguments we bolted out of the store.

[You know I have never told anyone the purse story. Though probably minor in some people's eyes, I have been mortified over that moment for all these years.]

Eventually Mark (the date) did call, and we set up a time to go shopping together for matching prom day clothes. Apparently it was tradition to wear matching shirts the day of prom. I didn't have any money to spend; I really don't know why I went anyway because I didn't expect him to pay for all that, but we went to the mall and he picked out a simple green gap T-shirt and a white hooded shirt to go over it. It was a good choice, and he paid for the shirts without any discussion. I remember being so surprised, and then feeling stupid for not knowing how these things should go.

He was all excited about the car he had rented for the night and kept telling me it was a surprise. I had actually expected a limo, but he wanted to be able to drive us around town that night himself. He was so excited about that car; I honestly don't remember what it was now - some sort of sedan, but I wasn't too terribly impressed (sorry Mark). The night was kind of drizzly, and I do remember driving down a back road and running over the millions of frogs that were scattered about the road in the mist. I can still hear them thumping against the tires. (funny the things I do remember) We went to dinner with another couple (who was that?) and I couldn't eat because I was so nervous. I felt bad for ordering food that I could barely eat (it was fettuccine Alfredo at PapaMia's), but he didn't miss a note and boxed it up for me when we were done. We gave the leftovers to a pan-handler at the next block and headed to the hotel the prom was hosted in.

I was mesmerized like a kid at Christmas - all the decorations and lights and fancy dresses... it was such a bizarre place for someone like me to be. I just didn't fit in with all of it - the kids, the experience, it was all so foreign. I didn't know how to act. I didn't know what to say. I must have been the dullest date ever! We talked to some friends for a little while and then took pictures in front of the grand piano. I had been carrying my stupid purse around and it's chain strap left a lovely red line across my shoulder. I think Mark had to put his hand there just to cover it! lol! I recall seeing Andrea B's high necked, sleeveless black dress and thinking, "THAT is what I should have looked for!". But there were a couple of girls with that same dress so I guess that would have been a bad thing.

Mark didn't want to dance (I desperately did) but I did manage to catch him coming across the dance floor from the other side of the room and we met in the middle and danced for the last half of one song (You're Once, Twice, Three Times a Lady). It was so nice. He actually sang a little of it, and I of course was giddy at how cute it was.

We didn't stay at the hotel long before leaving to go to the after prom party/lock-in at the school. We stopped off at his house to change clothes first. I had brought this cute little off the shoulder, Daisy Duke style shirt and some shorts to wear. I came out of the room and ran into Mark's mom who looked at me with much confusion. She asked me if we were supposed to wear our matching shirts to the after prom party, and clueless me blurted out "oh yeah, I guess I forgot" and ran back into the room. Thank GOODNESS I had thought enough to throw the shirts in my bag (I actually had brought them to wear the next day at the beach) - I can't imagine how embarrassing it would have been to go in something other than what he had picked out. Stupid me though forgot to take off my gaudy costume jewelry from the dress until about 5 in the morning, so I still looked like a dork all night.

We went to the after prom party and it was pretty neat. All of the parents had pitched in to create this pirate themed event and several were in charge of different games and activities. My parents were in charge of a maze that everyone had to crawl through. I am slightly claustrophobic and was terrified of crawling around in that maze, but thankfully the newspaper staff went in at the same time we did so we were able to crawl through the tunnels with the light from the reporter's video camera. Someone from the next group after us threw up in the tunnel so they had to shut it down. We got through just in time! We got married at the "prom chapel" and wandered around watching people all night. I don't remember much beyond that, other than sitting in the cafeteria at about 5 AM, trying not to fall asleep while listening to the endless prize giveaway winners. Generally everyone got a "prize" of gift certificates or cash and it took forever. We were so tired.

At 6 we went back to his parents house and crashed out on bunk beds in his little sister's room. A few hours later I was woken up by said sister, who was bouncing on my chest in the bottom bunk. Mark was on the top bunk laughing. We loaded up in his camaro and took off for the beach. I don't remember much after that.

It was a nice night; much better than anything I had experienced, but I sort of experienced it in a mental haze. When I think back to my school years, much of it was in that haze - just clueless to the world and just letting things happen around me. If it weren't for people dragging me along and spinning the earth for me, I probably never would have experienced anything.

Mark and I hung out a few times after that; always with friends at my house or at a local restaurant. We never dated, even though I had a huge, huge crush on him. One night he brought me home and I guess I lingered too long in my driveway talking to him. Suddenly he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder and carried me to the door. I think that was one of my fondest moments. It felt...real.

I didn't have a lot of real moments in high school.

Just thought I would get it written out before I forgot it completely.

Until,
D :)

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Bad Girl

I really wanted some Girl Scout cookies.

But I decided to be good and ate some strawberry yogurt.

But I still wanted the cookies.

So I ate the rest of Kiddo's raspberry yogurt (he didn't like the seeds anyway).

But cookies still sounded good.

But buttered toast with cream cheese sounded ok too.

Except the cream cheese spread was moldy.

And I burned the toast.

But I ate it anyway.

But I still wanted the cookies.

So I poured some milk.

And now the cookie sleeve is empty.

So much for being good.

I should have just eaten the cookies in the first place.

Until,
D :)

Monday, February 25, 2008

Mr. Roboto

"I'm sorry, I did not hear your selection. Could you please repeat it? If you would like the service department, please say 'service department'. If you would like appliances, please say 'appliances', if you would like sales, please say 'sales'. If you need parts and labor, please say 'parts and labor'. If you would like..."

I would like for her to shut up for a moment so I can repeat my selection. Actually I would like to talk to a REAL PERSON!!!!

ugh. I finally got a real person and they couldn't hear me, nor could I hear them. This is why I don't deal well with calling people. I won't even bore you with the confusion that ensued after that. No record of the purchase, wrong name associated with my address, having to pretend I was my mom; yeah - you don't wanna know.

Someone will be out at my house in 8 days.

8 DAYS!!!

I may have to go out and buy some paper and plastic ware. ugh.

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On a lighter note, I had an absolutely fabulous Saturday! I already told you about the cookies, right? Well, the day itself was simply gorgeous and I also had the pleasure of doing a photo shoot for a wonderful family. The weather could not have been more perfect (ok, so the wind was a little annoying, but I can deal with it) and the shoot went well. I was surprised at my ability to still get up and down (not as quickly as before, but that's ok) and I was even lying on my belly at one point. (sorry Port!) I came away from the shoot completely filthy and covered in grass, so I know it was a good one. lol!

And that got me thinking; I wonder if my clients ever wonder why I always look so ridiculous on shoots. I certainly don't dress for fashion; it is really all about function. I know I will be rolling around on the ground, so I always wear jeans. I also know I will be bending over and squatting a lot, so my shirts have to be long. I don't want to be flashing anyone the dreaded underwear waist band! Plus, I like to wear light colored clothing so that I reflect light into the subjects eyes. Finally, I have to pull my hair back in a multitude of clips so that my hair doesn't interfere with the camera, the lens or my mouth.

Not that I am ever a fashionista, but on photo shoots I look ridiculous. Saturday was no exception, especially adding that I am so fully pregnant at this point that there is not much out there that covers my belly. I wore a simple tank with a shirt over the top that I normally wear as a bathing suit cover up. It comes down to my thighs. It looked really weird all stretched out over my basketball belly and then hanging 6 inches below, but it certainly did the job when I was squatting on the ground knowing full well the waist band on the maternity jeans was around my hips!

Add to all that my camera bag slung across my chest. Because of the belly the strap now cuts just under my chest and kind of looks like a medieval torture device...

The dirtier I am at the end of the shoot, the better things have gone. My jeans and shoes were covered in grass stains and my shirt was covered in grass. I did lots of rolling around.

Anyway, after the shoot I stopped to pick up dinner at Schlotzsky's. It was a nice treat. Kiddo gobbled up a whole pizza! I managed to snag a bite before it was gone and I could instantly tell why he liked it so much - YUM!

Sunday after church we all piled in the car to look for photo shoot locations. This time of year it is hard to find nice places to shoot because everything is so brown. I have to get pretty creative! We found a couple of good spots and then stopped at a park so Kiddo could play. He followed all the other kids all over the playground and had so much fun. After a close call near the swing set (Kiddo almost got the snot knocked out of him) we decided it was time to go. Daddy got to witness the "Leaving the Park Melt Down". ;) It got pretty ugly.

But, it was a fun time and a much needed family outing. We don't do things like that together nearly enough.

I guess I should get back to editing my shoot. I have another coming up this weekend. Woo hoo!

Until,
D :)

Wash it All Away

Happy Monday!

Things aren't starting out so great here. Last night my sweet, wonderful, barely a year old Black Beauty started making the most horrendous grinding noise I've ever heard. Thankfully, my parents purchased a 5 year service plan so as soon as the store opens I will be on the phone trying to get someone out here.

Should I clean the house for a service person to come out? hmm...

As if that doesn't completely chap my hide and put a damper on the week, Kiddo decides to wake up at 7 am (an hour and a half early for him) and proceeds to peel me out of bed at such an ungodly hour. Normally I wouldn't mind getting up that early, but I know that without that last hour of sleep he will be a Grouch McGrouchy for the rest of the day. Of course, he didn't let me down when just 2 minutes after getting up he has a total melt down because he has no clean underwear.

Oh yeah, did I mention I need to do about 25 loads of laundry today??

One cup of coffee isn't going to be enough.

Until,
D :)

Saturday, February 23, 2008

C is For Cookie

My friends, God has answered my prayers!!



For a month now I have been searching. I've been praying. I've been desperately seeking...



GIRL SCOUT COOKIES!!!



And today good people, God placed a small offering in front of me at the local Walmart. One tiny girl scout and her mom, selling off the last of their cookies, the last weekend of sales.

I scored 2 boxes of thin mints and one of the Samoas.

Now to hide them from Kiddo and Hubby....

Until,
D :)

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Crazy

I'm still waiting on those brain cells.....

I just finished unloading about half of the dishwasher before I realized I never actually ran it. yuck. Now I am having to wash everything that touched everything I pulled out and put away. Oh well, at least I know things will be clean now???? wahhhhh!

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I had my perinatologist appointment this morning. It was so good to see my little stinker again; all his position changing of late has made me nervous, and after going through yesterday with him not moving much, seeing him wiggle all over the screen put my mind at ease (thankfully he is head down again). The tech checked out and showed me his lung function; I was totally right when I said I could see him breathing. She said his lungs look great and their movement "showed viability"; I guess that means that if I had him today his lungs would be in pretty good shape. Yay! However, all that excitement kind of took a back burner when we put all the measurements together and he is measuring 37+ weeks!!! lol! Again, she was shocked at his size (a robust 6 lbs, 8 oz - Lord help me!) and again she asked me if I passed my glucose test. I'm thinking, come on lady, I am 6' tall for crying out loud. The baby is going to be big. That is a given.

So, at a typical growth rate of 1/2 lb a week at this point, my wee one should come out at full term at a tiny, um, just under 10 pounds. Give or take...

*crickets*

Yeah, I am a bit nervous. Hello?

10 pounds!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!

*ahem* I'm ok, really. [putting self back together] Let's just hope he comes a bit early, shall we? I'm thinking between March 16 and 23rd would be ideal. My sister in law would be on spring break, all my booked photo shoots would be done and the shower and blessingway would be done too. Yep, that would be a good time for him to greet us.

Somebody place that order for me, ok? Thanks!

Until,
D :)

Oh yes, and we could actually see his Long, Flowing HAIR on the ultrasound! I guess that heartburn really was indicative of his hair growth! lol!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

If I Only Had a Brain

Good grief, can someone pass me some brain cells??!?

The fabulous photographer, Mollie K, finished my photos!! I am so excited! You can check out her favorites on her site, MollieK Photography , just look under Portfolio and Bellies! Thanks so much Mollie - I really love them!

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Plans are officially underway for the Blessingway. It will be in Houston, so if any of you know that you cannot attend and would still like to participate in some way, please shoot me an email at photomomdawn@yahoo.com I will give you some info! ;) I have email addresses for some of you who expressed interest, but there are a few that I don't have, so feel free to contact me at the above address.

I am very excited, and hopefully I won't go into labor before the event! lol!

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Speaking of going into labor, little Port is on the move again. I woke up this morning and he had turned BREECH!! Ack! I know there is still time for him to turn again, but mercy that kind of freaked me out. Actually, I think he turned back down this afternoon, as I could feel his hiccupping very low a little while ago. He was killing me last night though; that rotation really stretched things to their limit and made me sore. At 37 weeks Kiddo rotated breech, but thankfully turned around again shortly before birth. Hopefully this kid won't be so cruel! lol!

It is so neat to not be so swollen this time. I can see and feel more movement in my belly than I could with Kiddo. Sometimes when Port's little back is facing out, I can actually see and feel him breathing - it is so wicked!

My sweet tooth is taking over. I made a cake last night; butter cake with chocolate frosting - YUM! Kiddo asked me all afternoon if it was somebody's birthday! ha ha! Actually, it was my dear friend D's birthday, so I guess I could say that I made it in honor of her. Yeah, that's the ticket!

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Gah, there were a couple more things.... but I can't remember what they were. Oh well, 2 posts in one day is a bonus anyway, right? Maybe I'll find some more brain cells tomorrow.

Until,
D :)

Breakable

In an effort to comfort Kiddo more, I have been trying to indulge his desire to help me around the house. He has always loved doing laundry; I sit him atop the dryer and he "helps" me put the clothes and detergent and whatnot in the machine, then he turns it on for me. He loves putting clothes in and taking them out of the dryer and absolutely LOVES "using his big muscles" to pull the full laundry basket down the hall.

A couple of nights ago Hubby was busy editing some photos and Kiddo was underfoot while I was trying to make dinner, so I decided to let him help me. Oh Lordy! I was making a broiled salmon, so I had Kiddo squirt some lemon juice on the fish and he helped me with the seasonings too. He measured the rice and water into another pot and helped me pour some lima beans into a dish to cook. He basically did everything I did, and he absolutely loved the process. Of course, it made things that much more time consuming and difficult, but at least he wasn't whining and crying the whole time. Last night he helped me some in the kitchen too and it was kind of fun. But with everything I pulled out for him to do, he wanted to get the lemon juice. "So he could squirt it", he says.

Today Kiddo was trying to get me to get down on the floor with him to play and for the 743789247389th time I told him that I couldn't. He laid down on his belly and said "try this" and I replied, "baby I can't lay on my tummy or I will squish your baby brother".

He says "baby brudder CRAPPED!"

*insert dropped jaw smiley face here*

Me: "baby brother what??!?"
Kiddo: "baby brudder Crapped mommy"

Then he made a fist and pounded on the floor.

Desperately searching my preggo brain for a similar word (because we don't say "crap" in our house) I replied...
"baby brother is cracked??"

Kiddo: "yeah, like eggs." and he made the fist pound on the floor again.

[SHEW!]

Me: "oh no, I hope he's not cracked like an egg"
Kiddo: "yes, and he needs some juice"
Me: "some juice?"
Kiddo: "yes, some lemon juice. And mango juice. And grape and apple and lime juice"
Me: laughing "are we cooking?"
Kiddo: "yes, mommy, and baby brudder needs some lemon juice. and lime and mango and grape juice. yummy!"

I am just hoping he is not talking about cooking baby brother, but rather cooking with baby brother.

Yikes!

Until,
D :)

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Faith

Ok, just so we are straight here - this has come up twice now in the past week with different people.

I am almost 8 1/2 months pregnant. Not just over 7 - I am just over 8! People still think that because I have almost 2 months left that I am in my seventh month. Nope. I am 33+ weeks; that is over 8 months. See, a pregnancy, though typically described as 9 months is actually 40 weeks long - which, if you do the math, is 10 months.

So now that we are clear....

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Kiddo is getting needier and needier by the day. He is demanding cuddle time and play time and story time and snack time and they all must be attended by me, with me and with me as physically close to him as humanly possible. I cannot even get my coffee in me in the mornings before he is demanding my attention; and that is after a good 30 minute cuddle/play session in the bed (which I really do love, but this momma needs her coffee too!). And if he doesn't get it, he pulls this gut wrenching whiny crying thing like I broke his tiny fragile heart and I get so upset that I can't even function.

Because the reality is, my heart is breaking for him too. I can't stop thinking of how in a couple of short months, when Kiddo crawls into bed with me in the morning, most likely I will already be holding his baby brother. And when he tries to snuggle in close, there will be a baby attached to my breast. One will be in the way of the other more often than not, and any intrusion will most likely cause some sort of grief for somebody, more than likely Kiddo. And I hate that for him. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

And that is my biggest fear.

But this morning as we were cuddling in the bed and I smelled his hair and stroked his smooth skin, the thought came to me.

We will adjust.

We will adapt.

We will be ok.

I just have to have faith.

Until,
D :)

Sunday, February 17, 2008

My Valentine

I have been wanting to blog for days, but I can't seem to collect my thoughts for anything more than a line or two. I guess not much has been going on here. Let me see if I can come up with something (doesn't that sound terribly exciting?!?)

I think the baby was having another growth spurt last week. I was miserable all week, feeling huge and uncomfortable and dreading feeling that way for the next 7-8 weeks. Then suddenly on Wednesday I felt a lot better. By Thursday I was feeling great. I guess my body got accustomed to the extra girth and weight. Hubby and I actually got to have a night out on Valentine's day and it was wonderful. Then Friday morning about 4AM I started to have some cramping. It lasted throughout Friday - it was comparable to bad menstrual cramps (very low and tight) and nothing like the Braxton Hicks contractions I've been having. By Friday night I was getting nervous, but then thankfully it suddenly stopped. I guess we had too much fun!

Sometime between Thursday and Friday little Port switched positions and is now residing on my right side. For a long time his head, torso and booty have been on my left, with legs and arms on the right, and now things are the opposite. All that moving around this late in the game makes me nervous; I am trying not to think about where the cord might be in relation to all of that. He seems to like the right side though, as he has been more active than ever. The late night kick sessions he's been having are far more intense than before. Sometimes I wake up laughing at the punchy, jabby Kung Fu moves going on in my belly.

I have two doctor's appointments coming up this week; one with the perinatologist and one with my regular ob. I am excited to get another ultrasound and see if he has grown much in the last month. It seems like just yesterday we discovered he was a little Buddha!

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On Wednesday my good friend and talented photographer, Mollie came by and we attempted to get some maternity shots of me while our boys played. Of course, when I am the one in front of the camera my creativity goes out the window and I draw a blank when it comes to poses. Between that, the low light situation in my house and the boys running in every now and then, I think that it might have been a "trial by fire" first maternity shoot for Miss Mollie! I hope I didn't scare her away from maternity shoots in the future - M, I promise they are not all that challenging! Lol!

Thursday afternoon Grammy and Happy came to town and graciously offered to watch Kiddo while Hubby and I had a night out. I am usually not a big fan of going out on major "couples" holidays - but I figured we may not have the opportunity for a long time to go somewhere kid free so we took advantage. Our original plan was to go to a movie/dinner theater so we could eat dinner while watching a movie, thus cutting down on the time away, but unfortunately all the shows were sold out when we arrived (45 minutes early mind you - dang online ticket sales!). We opted to go to the regular theater for a movie first since the wait at any restaurant in town was going to be an hour anyway. Sweet Hubby let me pick the movie, and didn't complain when it was a total chick flick! Afterwards we went to dinner and had a wonderful meal together, minus any mention of mac-n-cheese or kids meals; ahhhh! It was so nice!

Friday G&H traveled to the next city to see my oh so talented sister in law direct her fabulous choir at the Texas Music Educators Association annual conference, and from what I hear the performance was spectacular! Congratulations A, you make us all so proud. I wish I could have been there. I was going to give G&H my Flip to video the event and just completely forgot. I hope you have access to a recording of the performance because I would love to see or hear it.

When they got back, Grammy and I dove into the recesses of Kiddo's closet and pulled out all the buckets of clothing I have stored there for the past 3 years. We separated out all of the newborn items and stuffed Port's dresser with things to wear, as well as receiving blankets, burp rags, a couple of diapers and all the diapering accessories I currently have. I am waiting on an order of Chinese Prefolds and have yet to order the diaper covers. I guess I should do that this week.

Saturday was more of the same as we dove into the other side of the closet and pulled out the baby swing, bouncy seat, lots of toys, the pack-n-play, two car seats, various other items, and then rearranged and cleaned out until we were able to move Kiddo's dresser into the closet. Happy and Hubby set up the crib, moved around our bedroom furniture to accommodate it, move the Kiddo's dresser for us and fixed the closet door (that thing has been messed up since we moved in this house!). We got a lot accomplished. In the process though, Kiddo discovered some toys that I had been hiding until I could get rid of them and guess what things are now his favorite to play with?!? uh huh. I have no clue how I am going to get rid of them now. sigh

It was a highly productive couple of days though so I am feeling a lot better about being prepared for this baby. Mostly it reinforced the fact that we really don't need many things to get started, and the few things we do need I can pick up on my next visit to Target. Thank goodness!

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I believe the Blessingway is going to happen!! I have two wonderful friends in Houston that are working together to make it happen (of course I have to drive to Houston, but I guess it'll be ok) and I am really getting excited. Invites should be going out this week. I will be contacting a couple of you via email about participating long distance, so look for that in your inbox.

I am still on the fence about the henna tattoo...

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Well, I guess I did have some things to talk about. I have more, but it is getting late and I should wrap this up.

Until,
D :)

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Turn Around

Where are you going my little one, little one
Where are you going my baby my own
Turn around and you’re two,
Turn around and you’re four
Turn around and you’re a young [boy]
Going out of the door


Interesting Development...

So a while back I mentioned that I was thinking of putting Kiddo in a Mom's Day Out or Preschool/daycare type program in the near future. I didn't want to just stick him anywhere, and the places I am really interested in cost an arm and a leg. Ideally, I thought he might benefit from a two day a week kind of thing; he could get some good play and socialization time and I would have time to do photo shoots and spend some one on one with new baby Port.

Our church has a private Christian school affiliated with it. We have been tossing around the idea for some time now of possibly putting Kiddo in the school; if we could afford it and I decided not to home school when the times comes for him to go to Kindergarten. I have always thought I would home school for a little while at least, but we wanted a back up plan in case I changed my mind or we decided that public school was undesirable. I am still on the fence about all of that and honestly, I never in a million years thought I would send Kiddo to preschool either, but like most everything, life changes you. Kiddo thrives on interaction with other kids. He so looks forward to Sunday school each week and the few playdates I take him on, and my guilt about being anti-social and not providing him with social opportunities has really changed my thoughts about part time schools before the age of 5.

So the church school sounds great, but they only have classes for K-12.

Well, at least they did until recently.

We just received word that this year they are starting a pre-K program for kids who turn 4 by September 1st. Kiddo would make the cut-off. The program is either 5 half days or 3 half days, and the prices are really reasonable. I am very interested in the program - but of course, the hard part is figuring out how to pay for it.

But it does give me something to think about...

Until,
D :)

Monday, February 11, 2008

The Way I Am

32 Weeks. Oy vey.

First I wanted to thank all of you that commented on my blessingway thread. You ladies, near and far, mean so very much to me. And your encouragement and support warmed my heart and brought tears to my eyes. I will certainly contact the couple of you that expressed interest in participating in absentia.

In baby news, I am officially gigantic. I will be shopping for muumuus this week; don't be scared if a big Hawaiian print comes your way at a playdate. It's just me. ;) Seriously though, if I get one more comment from a total stranger...

ex: The guy at Starbucks who, about 5 months ago (before I was really showing) asked me when I was due, and then frantically backpedaled when I looked offended and said he thought I might be pregnant because I was ordering decaf coffee (at 8PM mind you)....same guy last week, asked me again when I was due. I said April. He says, and I kid you not, "but that's 2 MONTHS from now!!"

uh huh

I met a really nice mom on the playground Friday that is due March 24th. She is about half my size (belly wise). ugh.

I am officially wearing the largest maternity clothes I have because everything else won't cover the belly.

I look like a turtle on it's back when trying to get out of bed.

I am starting to sprout new stretch marks.

My back HURTS.

I grunt and groan just walking down the hall.

I waddle. nuff said.

I really have two months left. Truly. How am I going to be in two months?? They may need a fork lift to get my laboring body into the hospital bed.

But get this. Even though I am huge, I still weigh 30 pounds LESS than I did at this time with the Kiddo.

How's that for a difference? Think I might have been retaining some water with him?? mmmhmm. Think I might have been just slightly preeclamptic??? mmmmhmmm.

But still, I have gained 35 pounds. However, I figure Port is about 2 foot 6 and weighs a good 12 pounds by now so that should be about right. ;)

Lord help me. I am delirious.

Until,
D :)

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Feed Me Seymour

Food during Pregnancy: A Special Report

So I know that none of you really care what I eat. I mean isn't there a book about blogging out there called something like "No One Cares What You Ate For Breakfast"? Yeah well, if you have ever been pregnant, (and most of you have, admit it!) you know that one of the best and worst things about being pregnant is the food.

Glorious food!

Some women take the "eat anything and everything" approach while others finally start trying to eat right. And then there are the many in between. My first pregnancy, I was kind of in the eat anything and everything camp - of course making sure to avoid all those textbook things like soft cheeses and deli meat and shell fish. This time, I am trying to be healthier - it took me a good 2+ years to get rid of the weight after I had Kiddo, so I am hoping to stay a bit on the conservative side this time.

Don't get me wrong though, I have been thoroughly enjoying my brownies and sweets and salty things too, just not as much this time.

But the problem with this pregnancy though has been 2 big things that are severely inhibiting my enjoyment of food. First is the constant, chronic, painfully annoying heartburn. No matter what I eat or how often or how little or how far before bed; it is always there. The acid bubbles in my throat morning, noon and night and I am about to go nuts. The owners of TUMS have sent me personal emails, thanking me for funding their 401Ks. The second thing that has messed up my culinary delight is that for some reason this time around, my taste buds are less sensitive to different tastes. I know this is pretty common; some women even go through an entire pregnancy with a metal taste in their mouth. I have been spared that for the most part, but what I am experiencing makes everything taste really bland. My beloved Dr. Pepper tastes far from normal and all I really want to eat are things that are bold flavored, spicy or super sweet; thus compounding the first problem!

What is really strange is that I am enjoying things I never really liked before, like Italian Sausage. I have been making this stew just about every week. Hubby is loving it of course, but I have to down a half a bottle of Tums before bed or it is a total nightmare! (oh and if you try the recipe, I always throw in another half can of water and use 2 cups noodles and a can of Rotel instead of canned Italian tomatoes)

I have never been a fan of spicy foods. I love Mexican food and Tex/Mex, but if it is too spicy I just don't enjoy it. One thing you can always get me to eat though is pretty much anything with Wasabi on it! YUM! I love wasabi - and for those of you who have never had it, it is a wonderful spice that unlike a hot pepper that burns your mouth, the heat is radiated up through the sinuses, clearing your breathing passages, and just when you think it is going to be too hot, it quickly fades, leaving no residual "burnt tongue" to deal with. It is wonderful.

-my cultured bloggy friends, I know you are wondering who on earth hasn't tried wasabi, but here in TX I have found many who haven't; namely most of my friends and family! lol!"-

So anyway, the regular cravings are really leaving me disappointed because not much has that intense flavor I am looking for.

But, I have to tell you about a few things that have really rung my bell lately.

Chili's has a new boneless buffalo wing, called Shanghai Wings. They are wings coated with a sweet and spicy ginger-citrus sauce and they are served with the most incredible WASABI RANCH dipping sauce!!!! AHHHH! I could have eaten that dressing with a spoon. It was sheer heaven! You must go try them.

Another favorite treat of mine right now are the Blue Diamond Bold Wasabi and Soy Sauce Almonds. These are totally delish, and a great source of fiber!

Then of course on the sweet side, I am loving the German Chocolate cake I made Hubby for his birthday. Yum! But I did discover a good treat (though expensive for what you get) at Sonic in their Caramel Apple Bites (the dipping sauce doesn't have any flavor to me though). If you don't have a Sonic in your area, I am so sorry. They are a fantastic preggo lady place. The ice in their drinks is AWESOME! When I was pregnant with Kiddo I went to Sonic every day and got a huge cup of ice. mmmmmmm! They have a daily happy hour now, with half price drinks (which makes them reasonably priced, lol!) Many a time Kiddo and I have enjoyed a cool drink and a caramel apple bite for an afternoon snack. :)

So here are a few of my favorites. And I am not trying to say I eat out a lot. I have hit Micky D's a lot this pregnancy (normally I would never go there) but that is for specific cheeseburger cravings and they never disappoint. I just wanted to share a few of my favorite things right now. And if you don't care what I eat, that's ok. This blog's purpose is for my memory too. Someday I will look back at it and laugh.

Meanwhile, I am off to Sonic...

Until,
D :)

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Would You Go With Me

Ok, so back to the subject of birthing. Aren't you excited we are still talking about this?? ;)

Thank you to those that recommended the HypnoBirthing book. I actually had the book and tapes sitting in my office because my sweet neighbor passed them on to me when she moved. I never thought to even look at them, but after you guys reminded me about them the other day I pulled them out.

HALLELUJIA!!

The answer I've been looking for!

This may sound strange, but the philosophy just makes sense to me. I mean, I sit there and read and my head is screaming "yes, yes, YES!" This is what my heart has been trying to tell my head all this time!!!"

I know, I'm strange. My head talks to itself. Doesn't yours?

Anyway, I am pouring through the book and getting all excited. While reading, I could see myself having Kiddo all over again. And in all honesty, the time that I labored without the epidural was not painful. The only reason I got the epi was because the doctor told me they were going to break my water and start pitocin and all the negative, scary things my friends had told me about those two things got me scared. (the theory behind the Natural Birth experience is Fear=Tension=Pain. Without fear there is no tension and without tension there is no pain. Up until that point in my first labor, I had no fear of what my body was doing. There was no pain because I knew that God had designed all those organs and muscles to work the way they should. I didn't fight what was happening because I knew it was the perfect design.) They did the epi before I ever felt any pain; actually the epi was what really hurt - but I think I could have gone the last 3 cm without it. But I have said that before.

So, I am going to give this HypnoBirthing thing a shot. And as long as there are no complications with this birth, I have confidence I can do this without any drugs. How wonderful that will be!

I still wanted to throw out an idea or two about what I was hoping I could do before I go into labor though. Several of my friends have expressed interest in throwing me a shower for this baby. And though it is a wonderful, lovely, sweet gesture, there really isn't much we need for him; especially not things I would expect my friends to buy for me. Anyone want to shell out $250 for a breast pump?? Yeah, I didn't think so. ;) Anyway, a while back (like a year ago or so) I stumbled upon a wonderful blog called Oh The Joys. You will see her linked in my sidebar. Anyway, when Ms OTJ was preggo with her second baby her wonderful Hubby put together a little soiree for her and the baby. And it turned out to be one of the most meaningful things he could have done. He organized a Blessingway.

If you are not familiar with a Blessingway, initial research may make you tilt your head, wrinkle up your nose and say "huh?". But if you dig deeper, you will find that it a wonderful way to celebrate an upcoming birth and put some focused energy into the mother by giving her the strength and support she needs to get through the event of labor. Generally a Blessingway is a gathering of the mother's close women companions (this is not really the kind of thing Aunt Shirley would want to go to - no doilies or finger sandwiches will be present) and they come together to celebrate life and their support of the mom to be. Often the women will perform what I like to call "comfort rituals" by brushing and styling the mother's hair, or washing her feet (though, in my case no one is getting near my feet! lol!). Generally lights are low, music is soft and the women sit together sharing stories of how their relationship with the mom has influenced and enhanced their lives. They create things to represent blessings wished for the mom and the baby. It can be all out New Agey or just really mainstream and meaningful.

I really like the concept of Blessingways as opposed to a traditional baby shower, especially for second, third, etc. children. Because a lot of people find a shower for subsequent babies tacky, it is a nice way to still support and uplift the mother, while celebrating the new life growing in side her.

I would love to have a Blessingway. My vision of what I would like of course would not include circle time and ritualistic chants, but rather a gathering of important women in my life and a few choice tasks. One such task common in a traditional Blessingway is the making of a beaded necklace or bracelet. Each guest brings a hand selected bead that they want to represent a wish or blessing for the mother and child, and at the Blessingway each person speaks their wish to the mother and the bead is then strung to make the necklace. The mother can then hold or wear the necklace while in labor, as a reminder of all those thinking and praying for her at that time. Another activity involves looping a cord or string around the wrist of each person in attendance, signifying the joining of all together. After well wishes/prayers/blessings are given, the cord is then cut and each person wears their loop until the baby is born. I like that everyone would have a reminder of the event to happen and a symbol of their support on their wrist. Another activity involves writing blessings or well wishes on paper for the baby book or for the mother to read at the time of labor.

I have come to the realization that I am uplifted by just the mere knowledge that people are thinking of and/or praying for me. After all, that thought is what drives this blog. I live for comments and page hits - I'll admit that I thrive on attention. And I think that in my quest to have a good labor experience and focus my mind on the blessings that God has given me in my friends, family and in this new life, the Blessingway would be another source of strength to draw from. I think having a tangible symbol of the support of my girlfriends (like the necklace), many who have had their own labor experiences, would help me stay focused.

And, though I don't know if I would actually do this (although it does sound really appealing), Ms OTJ got her belly "tattooed" by a Mendhi artist, which resulted what I think is the coolest looking pregnant belly EVER! Check out her pictures at the bottom of the post - AWESOME! :)

So, as a friend, family member, or just random blog reader - would you come to such an event? Would you find it hokey or meaningful? Do you think it is a good way to celebrate a new baby, without all the traditional gift exchange and silly party games? I would love to know your thoughts.

*hint, hint* the comments link is right down below.... ;)

Until,
D :)

Sunday, February 03, 2008

This Time

Anyway, so where I was trying to go with the last post was far, far from where it ended up. I was going to talk about music in relation to the birth of this child! lol! So much for a focused mind!!


Ok, so I have been thinking about the birth a lot lately. Typical, oh mercy I am in the home stretch thoughts - you know the drill. When I was pg with Kiddo, my plan was to make a cd of my favorite tunes and have them playing during labor. Unfortunately, I did most of my laboring in the middle of the night and everyone, including me, was sleeping! So, no time for tunes then. In the morning, everything was so chaotic and messed up that I didn't even think about music, much less anything else except getting Kiddo out safely. And in that I missed out on that part of the birth plan.



I am hoping this time I have some time to "labor" in peace. And I would like to be able to listen to my mp3 player or play some tunes in the room to relax me. I was thinking today in church how nice it would be if they recorded the worship music and made it available for download from the church website. I don't think they do - but I will certainly check. I wish there was a way to get recordings of my favorite tunes they sing without having to be covert in recording it. Any ideas?



And in thinking about the birth, I am considering once again trying for a drug free delivery. I wanted that with Kiddo, but with all the chaos and interventions, I frankly just got scared and opted for the epidural. Now don't get me wrong - that epidural was, without a doubt, WONDERFUL, but I wish I had had a better resolve and tried to deliver without it. I got to 7 centimeters dilated without it, and the only reason I decided to get it was because they decided to break my waters and it scared me. I think I could have handled it. I would have liked to try.



So I am back to thinking I can do this. Women do it every day without medication. And honestly, I think that there is only one thing that could mess that up, aside from there being a complication, and that thing is the memory of Kiddo's birth experience. Even now when I imagine this upcoming birth, I slip into the past and start remembering having Kiddo and I instantly tense up and get emotional.



If I do decide to try for natural child birth, I need a coping mechanism to get me through the fear of something going wrong like it did with Kiddo. And in my thoughts on this, my mind keeps directing me to my faith. I need to be able to focus on God and I need to be reminded that it is all in His hands and that worrying does nothing. I need to be able to give my worries to Him and know that there are lots of people praying for and thinking of me while I am in labor, and I need to use that knowledge to keep me focused on the task at hand. Because I know I can overcome the pain, it is the fear and worry that will sink me.



And in my thinking, I feel that the music from church can help me accomplish all of that. A couple of other things can help me with that too - and that will be the subject of my next post.



Until,

D :)

Anything Goes

Ah, it was a beautiful day today. Actually it has been really nice the past few days. I guess I shouldn't complain about Texas weather so much, as a lot of the country is covered in several inches of snow and we are running around in shorts.



But today was nice, almost too hot surprisingly, but definitely a welcome change from the past few weeks of cold. Church was good today, as usual, although it was severely stuffy in the sanctuary. It was not the best environment for a big ol' preggo lady, but it didn't bother me near as bad as it did Hubby. The music was great too - they performed a bunch of stuff I didn't recognize but that was ok. I couldn't sing much because of the heat; it made me light headed.



The singing thing is going much better. I guess God has decided to work with me on that; I don't get near as choked up as I did unless I think about it a lot. Thank goodness because I so enjoy the music every Sunday. I wish they would put in the bulletin who was singing each week. I feel like I am sharing something with the 4 or 5 people that lead the music in the service and I don't know their names. It drives me nuts. I am not the type to walk up to folks and introduce myself, but it would be nice if I saw them in the hall I could address them by name and thank them for enhancing the worship that morning. I suppose I could do that without a name too. Eh, it still would be nice.



After posting that entry about singing a while back and receiving some of the comments, it occurred to me that in all my singing experience, in all the hundreds and hundreds of concerts and performances and solos and recitals - it is very, maybe even extremely likely that I do NOT have one single recording of myself performing (talking about college and after stuff here - Mom and Dad, back away from the jr. high videos please!). How can that be??? I know I have an audio tape of my junior year college recital somewhere, but I have no idea where it is. I have got to find that and figure out a way to convert it to digital. I know the college should have a library of all the concerts and stuff, but can you imagine trying to find yourself in all those archives??!? Insane!



Anyway it makes me sad. I kind of wish we still lived in AZ, then I could have David help me record some stuff. That would be awesome. Of course, I don't sound anything like I did then. Ah well. The only person that hears me sing now is Kiddo and the poor unfortunate soul in the row in front of me at church. That's ok.



I have been very hormonal lately. Very moody and cranky. Everything is getting on my nerves. I hate being like this. It really does bother me, but I am pretty much powerless to stop it at this point.



And to make the emotional rollercoaster that much more of a ride, we have had some highs and lows this week. I found out that an old high school friend received a cancer diagnosis. She is 32. 32!!!! So very young to go through something like this. But you know what is amazing? She has the most wonderful faith. The most positive, God praising attitude about the whole thing - I am just completely blown away by her unwavering testimony at what must be a terrifying and troubling time in her life. I am awed by her strength and her constant faith and praise. Please keep her and her family in your prayers. She has a wonderful hubby and two handsome teenage boys.



And in the highs we have the news that my good friend B had her 3rd baby yesterday - a little boy (after 2 girls)!!! I am so happy for her. And I am dying to see pictures!



So I am all over the place today. Sorry - I just felt the need to babble. I managed a picture today. Here is me and the Port man at 31 weeks officially.

Sorry I didn't dress up for you. ;) My ball gown is at the cleaners.

I know, I look tired. I am.

Until,

D :)

Friday, February 01, 2008

Hippo Birdie Two Ewe

Today is a very special day!

The cat doesn't care though...

The dog is not really sure what is up.

" Mom, why are you taking my picture?"

"Seriously, please stop taking my picture. I just want to be fed."

"Moooooom, please stop taking my picture!! I'm gonna lick you. And you saw what I licked a minute ago. You don't want that."

Maybe the day is special because Kiddo is giving Hubby a head scratch???
Nope!
Happy Birthday to You!


Happy Birthday to You!!

Happy Birthday Dear Daddy!!!



Happy Birthday to YOU!!!!!


YAY!!!!!!


Let them eat CAKE!!


LOL!

Happy Birthday Hubby!! I hope it was a good one!
Smooches,
D :)
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