A minute later - my new baby burrito.
G&H with the new guy.
The longest, narrowest baby foot I've ever seen.
Old lady fingers!
My helpful guy.
Awwwww!
Proud big brother!
Story to come...Until,
D:)
Monday, April 07, 2008
In Pictures
Just a few moments old and not too happy!
A minute later - my new baby burrito.
G&H with the new guy.
The longest, narrowest baby foot I've ever seen.
Old lady fingers!My helpful guy.Awwwww!
Proud big brother!Story to come...
A minute later - my new baby burrito. G&H with the new guy. The longest, narrowest baby foot I've ever seen. Old lady fingers!My helpful guy.Awwwww! Proud big brother!Story to come...
Saturday, April 05, 2008
About a Boy
Ok, where was I?
Heh, I guess my body has a thing for Thursdays. Both my children were born on Thursday.
My children. Wow, that sounds strange. I can't believe I have more than one child.
So after a very disappointing doctor's visit Wednesday morning (no change after having pretty steady contractions for about 8 hours), I stopped at Jack-n-the Box on the way home. A big, greasy cheeseburger and a chocolate shake seemed like the perfect thing to cure my frustration, at least for a little while (thanks Julia!;)). I was sitting in the drive thru line on the phone with a friend telling her that my contractions had all but stopped when I was hit with a big one. I had several more in line that were about 2 minutes apart. Then nothing.
I made it home and tried to take a nap, but Kiddo wasn’t letting me do it. He was more interested in bouncing on my belly. I pulled out my blessings book and read through each one slowly, letting the words absorb into my head. It was so neat seeing each person’s entry; the handwriting or the special paper or the decoration really brought special meaning to each blessing. I held the necklace in my hands, ran my fingers over the beads and placed a face and name to each one. It was a calming influence. I packed the necklace and the book in my hospital bag and made sure again that I had everything I needed.
By evening, my tolerable contractions turned into pretty uncomfortable stuff. They were random though - sometimes 10 minutes apart, sometimes 20. I managed to go to Walmart and the grocery store to pick up some last minute things though. Suddenly at about 9:30 the contractions started coming one on top of the other. I couldn't even catch my breath! We discussed going to the hospital, and the longer we talked about it, the further apart the contractions became. I spent a good bit of the evening talking to Mollie on IM – I think I was freaking her out a little! Lol! When the contractions evened out at about 3-5 minutes apart, I called the after hours service at the hospital and asked them to page the on call doctor. The girl said if he didn't call back in 20 minutes to call again. 30 minutes later, with no call we decided to go ahead and drop Kiddo off with Mollie for the night and just go. I called the service again from the car and the doctor called me back about 10 minutes later. He asked how far apart the contractions were and I told him, then he asked me if this was my first child and I said no. His reply was, "so you are on your way to the hospital right?". I told him yes and he said "good, I'll let them know you are coming" and that was that. We got there shortly after midnight.
When we got to the ER to check in, I had to sit in the car for a minute and breathe through a big contraction. I had experienced a few big ones on the way and I knew things were only going to progress. I checked in at the counter (thankfully they got my name in the system right this time – unlike with Kiddo) and we started the walk down the long hallway to the other side of the hospital. I had to stop and lean on Hubby in the hallway through a contraction, and the next thing I knew a security guard was putting me in a wheelchair. She insisted I ride to the room; she said she had seen too many babies born in odd places in the hospital and if I had to stop and lean on something during a contraction then it was time for me to ride. She was very sweet, and in a great humor for so late at night.
I was so afraid of getting there and not having any progress again, but thankfully I was dilated to a 4. I thought they were going to send me home, but because the contractions were coming so fast they admitted me. The nurses were really great and didn't even flinch when I refused any pain meds. They were all very encouraging, telling me how great I was doing when I had a contraction. I felt like I was handling everything pretty well, so I asked for a birthing ball, got out my mp3 player and settled in on the ball next to the bed. After all of my planning and shuffling songs to get just the right mix of music on there, the only thing I wanted to listen to was the Patti Griffin album, 1000 Kisses. The songs were perfect; not too sappy and not to up beat either. The nurse told me that I should progress about a cm per hour, so they would check me in a couple of hours to see how I was doing.
By then, Hubby was about to pass out so he pulled out the cot and tried to sleep. I sat there leaning on a stack of pillows on the bed, immersing myself in the music. The contractions were coming about every 2-3 minutes at that point and I was feeling ok. When one would come on, I would sing into it. At it’s peak all I could do was breathe and repeat to myself “baby down, body open. Baby down, body open”. Then I would sing it away. A couple of times I really had to concentrate on what was going on, or something else, or the music, or how much I resented my husband over there sleeping, etc. but I managed to do pretty good. I thought of all of my friends and family who were supporting me, and my energy would be renewed each time. Despite wanting to whack Hubby on the head for sleeping, I was in a very good mood. When a couple of hours passed they came to check and I was at a 7 already. The contractions were 1-2 minutes apart and I was still doing well. By the time I got to an 8 I was getting really irritated with Hubby - still across the room sleeping, so I made him get up and sit by me. It was hard telling him what I needed because I really couldn't talk while having the contractions and they were coming so fast, but he managed to hold my hand when necessary and put a cold rag on my head when I needed it. The birth ball was a lifesaver – and honestly I couldn’t bounce on it (which is what I thought I would do). The shape of it was what made me more comfortable for some reason; I guess because my hips could drop and my back stayed straight.
At one point I asked if I could get some help to the bathroom because I needed to pee, and the nurse asked me if I had any pressure. I laughed it off and said no, but as soon as I sat on the toilet it was obvious I had been in denial. I came out of there quickly and was helped into bed. They checked me and I was at 9 so they started to set things up. Then nurse said that my water was probably going to break soon and to be prepared - it totally didn't! lol! She even tried to pierce it by pinching the edges (and I could completely feel everything - it felt like she was trying to pop it with a fingernail). I had another contraction and I felt a little trickle so I told them I thought my water broke. They (the nurses) thought so too. At that point I was feeling pressure with the contractions, so they told me I could push on the next one if I wanted to. I still had a little bit of cervix hanging around, but they thought if I pushed it would finally go away. The first time I pushed there was a huge pop and my water went everywhere! I pushed 2 more times in the first contraction and they ran to get the doctor because his head was right there. I wanted to keep pushing, but he told me not to. I was screaming at him, "but his head is right there, I can feel it!!!". By the time the next contraction came along the baby had gone back up a bit so I had to bring him back down again. I pushed three times and he was right there. The doc told me to take a breath in and when I did, the baby's head popped out! lol! I pushed 3 times through the next contraction and on the 4th contraction I was able to deliver his body - it was so hard to get my legs to stay back; with one hand I was pulling my right leg back and with the other I was pushing it forward. I had no idea I was doing that and when the nurse pointed it out I was able to focus and get the baby's body out. It was so strange and awesome because I could feel everything and really work with my body on pushing out the baby efficiently. I could feel the energy in the room. It really was magical.
The doctor and nurses joked that I had no tearing at all, merely a “skid mark” as they put it, and that I really did great. I felt amazing! Truly, truly amazing. It was such a rush and not having that drugged haze was so nice. I hadn’t any sleep in the past 24 hours or so and I felt great.
Anyway, Port came out screaming and clawing at my gown! They put him on my belly and he was just perfect and gooey! I couldn't believe I was actually holding him and touching him. He was pink and squirmy and wide eyed. Hubby cut the cord (he didn’t get to with Kiddo) and I noticed he looked a little grossed out. They took him over to weigh and he immediately peed all over the nurse! She screamed and everyone laughed – she had apparently been peed on several times that day already. They shouted out his apgars were 9/9 and everyone was so excited. Port was screaming and crying and it was the most beautiful sound ever.
I delivered the placenta – and when it came out I shouted “ahh, that felt so good!!!” Once the words were out of my mouth of course I was completely embarrassed. The energy in the room was one of joy and laughter and happiness. It was so different from my last experience. There was no tension, just excitement; no worries or fear, just anticipation and joy. Everyone was smiling, laughing, talking excitedly…
The doctor put one stitch in (just to tighten things up a bit) and I was good as new. Soon enough Port was back in my arms and so beautiful and tiny and perfect.
Then I noticed the rash on his face. He has neonatal lupus too - but this time no one was really concerned because he was obviously so alert and healthy. The odds – what are the odds? My miracle child had neonatal lupus but was healthy. Praise God!
The birth was almost the complete opposite of Kiddo’s birth. It was amazing - and I am so glad I made the choice to do it without drugs. I really feel it made all the difference in the world. I could concentrate on myself and all of the powerful energy my amazing friends and family were sending. I felt it in the room; I felt it in my soul and my body. The natural high lasted for hours. I stayed awake and felt wonderful for most of the next day. Even through visitors and nurses and room changes I was energized and filled with so much joy. People commented on how wonderful I looked – so much different from last time. And what was amazing too was I was not sore or uncomfortable in any way. I could move around, get up and down and do all the things I needed to do (within reason). Even though I was ready to go home on Friday, they made me stay till Saturday. We brought him home in our now full-of-car-seats car and are blissfully happy to have him with us.
Thanks for reading.
Until,
D :)
Heh, I guess my body has a thing for Thursdays. Both my children were born on Thursday.
My children. Wow, that sounds strange. I can't believe I have more than one child.
So after a very disappointing doctor's visit Wednesday morning (no change after having pretty steady contractions for about 8 hours), I stopped at Jack-n-the Box on the way home. A big, greasy cheeseburger and a chocolate shake seemed like the perfect thing to cure my frustration, at least for a little while (thanks Julia!;)). I was sitting in the drive thru line on the phone with a friend telling her that my contractions had all but stopped when I was hit with a big one. I had several more in line that were about 2 minutes apart. Then nothing.
I made it home and tried to take a nap, but Kiddo wasn’t letting me do it. He was more interested in bouncing on my belly. I pulled out my blessings book and read through each one slowly, letting the words absorb into my head. It was so neat seeing each person’s entry; the handwriting or the special paper or the decoration really brought special meaning to each blessing. I held the necklace in my hands, ran my fingers over the beads and placed a face and name to each one. It was a calming influence. I packed the necklace and the book in my hospital bag and made sure again that I had everything I needed.
By evening, my tolerable contractions turned into pretty uncomfortable stuff. They were random though - sometimes 10 minutes apart, sometimes 20. I managed to go to Walmart and the grocery store to pick up some last minute things though. Suddenly at about 9:30 the contractions started coming one on top of the other. I couldn't even catch my breath! We discussed going to the hospital, and the longer we talked about it, the further apart the contractions became. I spent a good bit of the evening talking to Mollie on IM – I think I was freaking her out a little! Lol! When the contractions evened out at about 3-5 minutes apart, I called the after hours service at the hospital and asked them to page the on call doctor. The girl said if he didn't call back in 20 minutes to call again. 30 minutes later, with no call we decided to go ahead and drop Kiddo off with Mollie for the night and just go. I called the service again from the car and the doctor called me back about 10 minutes later. He asked how far apart the contractions were and I told him, then he asked me if this was my first child and I said no. His reply was, "so you are on your way to the hospital right?". I told him yes and he said "good, I'll let them know you are coming" and that was that. We got there shortly after midnight.
When we got to the ER to check in, I had to sit in the car for a minute and breathe through a big contraction. I had experienced a few big ones on the way and I knew things were only going to progress. I checked in at the counter (thankfully they got my name in the system right this time – unlike with Kiddo) and we started the walk down the long hallway to the other side of the hospital. I had to stop and lean on Hubby in the hallway through a contraction, and the next thing I knew a security guard was putting me in a wheelchair. She insisted I ride to the room; she said she had seen too many babies born in odd places in the hospital and if I had to stop and lean on something during a contraction then it was time for me to ride. She was very sweet, and in a great humor for so late at night.
I was so afraid of getting there and not having any progress again, but thankfully I was dilated to a 4. I thought they were going to send me home, but because the contractions were coming so fast they admitted me. The nurses were really great and didn't even flinch when I refused any pain meds. They were all very encouraging, telling me how great I was doing when I had a contraction. I felt like I was handling everything pretty well, so I asked for a birthing ball, got out my mp3 player and settled in on the ball next to the bed. After all of my planning and shuffling songs to get just the right mix of music on there, the only thing I wanted to listen to was the Patti Griffin album, 1000 Kisses. The songs were perfect; not too sappy and not to up beat either. The nurse told me that I should progress about a cm per hour, so they would check me in a couple of hours to see how I was doing.
By then, Hubby was about to pass out so he pulled out the cot and tried to sleep. I sat there leaning on a stack of pillows on the bed, immersing myself in the music. The contractions were coming about every 2-3 minutes at that point and I was feeling ok. When one would come on, I would sing into it. At it’s peak all I could do was breathe and repeat to myself “baby down, body open. Baby down, body open”. Then I would sing it away. A couple of times I really had to concentrate on what was going on, or something else, or the music, or how much I resented my husband over there sleeping, etc. but I managed to do pretty good. I thought of all of my friends and family who were supporting me, and my energy would be renewed each time. Despite wanting to whack Hubby on the head for sleeping, I was in a very good mood. When a couple of hours passed they came to check and I was at a 7 already. The contractions were 1-2 minutes apart and I was still doing well. By the time I got to an 8 I was getting really irritated with Hubby - still across the room sleeping, so I made him get up and sit by me. It was hard telling him what I needed because I really couldn't talk while having the contractions and they were coming so fast, but he managed to hold my hand when necessary and put a cold rag on my head when I needed it. The birth ball was a lifesaver – and honestly I couldn’t bounce on it (which is what I thought I would do). The shape of it was what made me more comfortable for some reason; I guess because my hips could drop and my back stayed straight.
At one point I asked if I could get some help to the bathroom because I needed to pee, and the nurse asked me if I had any pressure. I laughed it off and said no, but as soon as I sat on the toilet it was obvious I had been in denial. I came out of there quickly and was helped into bed. They checked me and I was at 9 so they started to set things up. Then nurse said that my water was probably going to break soon and to be prepared - it totally didn't! lol! She even tried to pierce it by pinching the edges (and I could completely feel everything - it felt like she was trying to pop it with a fingernail). I had another contraction and I felt a little trickle so I told them I thought my water broke. They (the nurses) thought so too. At that point I was feeling pressure with the contractions, so they told me I could push on the next one if I wanted to. I still had a little bit of cervix hanging around, but they thought if I pushed it would finally go away. The first time I pushed there was a huge pop and my water went everywhere! I pushed 2 more times in the first contraction and they ran to get the doctor because his head was right there. I wanted to keep pushing, but he told me not to. I was screaming at him, "but his head is right there, I can feel it!!!". By the time the next contraction came along the baby had gone back up a bit so I had to bring him back down again. I pushed three times and he was right there. The doc told me to take a breath in and when I did, the baby's head popped out! lol! I pushed 3 times through the next contraction and on the 4th contraction I was able to deliver his body - it was so hard to get my legs to stay back; with one hand I was pulling my right leg back and with the other I was pushing it forward. I had no idea I was doing that and when the nurse pointed it out I was able to focus and get the baby's body out. It was so strange and awesome because I could feel everything and really work with my body on pushing out the baby efficiently. I could feel the energy in the room. It really was magical.
The doctor and nurses joked that I had no tearing at all, merely a “skid mark” as they put it, and that I really did great. I felt amazing! Truly, truly amazing. It was such a rush and not having that drugged haze was so nice. I hadn’t any sleep in the past 24 hours or so and I felt great.
Anyway, Port came out screaming and clawing at my gown! They put him on my belly and he was just perfect and gooey! I couldn't believe I was actually holding him and touching him. He was pink and squirmy and wide eyed. Hubby cut the cord (he didn’t get to with Kiddo) and I noticed he looked a little grossed out. They took him over to weigh and he immediately peed all over the nurse! She screamed and everyone laughed – she had apparently been peed on several times that day already. They shouted out his apgars were 9/9 and everyone was so excited. Port was screaming and crying and it was the most beautiful sound ever.
I delivered the placenta – and when it came out I shouted “ahh, that felt so good!!!” Once the words were out of my mouth of course I was completely embarrassed. The energy in the room was one of joy and laughter and happiness. It was so different from my last experience. There was no tension, just excitement; no worries or fear, just anticipation and joy. Everyone was smiling, laughing, talking excitedly…
The doctor put one stitch in (just to tighten things up a bit) and I was good as new. Soon enough Port was back in my arms and so beautiful and tiny and perfect.
Then I noticed the rash on his face. He has neonatal lupus too - but this time no one was really concerned because he was obviously so alert and healthy. The odds – what are the odds? My miracle child had neonatal lupus but was healthy. Praise God!
The birth was almost the complete opposite of Kiddo’s birth. It was amazing - and I am so glad I made the choice to do it without drugs. I really feel it made all the difference in the world. I could concentrate on myself and all of the powerful energy my amazing friends and family were sending. I felt it in the room; I felt it in my soul and my body. The natural high lasted for hours. I stayed awake and felt wonderful for most of the next day. Even through visitors and nurses and room changes I was energized and filled with so much joy. People commented on how wonderful I looked – so much different from last time. And what was amazing too was I was not sore or uncomfortable in any way. I could move around, get up and down and do all the things I needed to do (within reason). Even though I was ready to go home on Friday, they made me stay till Saturday. We brought him home in our now full-of-car-seats car and are blissfully happy to have him with us.
Thanks for reading.
Until,
D :)
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Joy To The World
Well wouldn't you know that just when I thought I was down and out, my little man decided to come into the world after all!!
My new baby boy was born this morning at 4:51 AM. He came screaming into the world, clawing at my clothing and peeing on nurses!! He is amazing, wonderful, beautiful and such a fighter. At 8 pounds, 15 oz, my big boy is not as big as we thought he would be, but no light weight either.
Since I have been awake pretty much since 3:30 AM on Wednesday morning, I am about to turn out the light and try to get some sleep before they wake me for vitals at 2AM. I will try to get the whole story in bloggy form tomorrow.
Thank you all so much for the thoughts and prayers. I truly felt all of your positive energy with me throughout the labor and delivery. I was a magical experience!
Until,
D :)
My new baby boy was born this morning at 4:51 AM. He came screaming into the world, clawing at my clothing and peeing on nurses!! He is amazing, wonderful, beautiful and such a fighter. At 8 pounds, 15 oz, my big boy is not as big as we thought he would be, but no light weight either.
Since I have been awake pretty much since 3:30 AM on Wednesday morning, I am about to turn out the light and try to get some sleep before they wake me for vitals at 2AM. I will try to get the whole story in bloggy form tomorrow.
Thank you all so much for the thoughts and prayers. I truly felt all of your positive energy with me throughout the labor and delivery. I was a magical experience!
Until,
D :)
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Here You Come Again
In Recent News
Last night I started having contractions. I had a couple around 6:00 and then a couple more around 8:00. I decided to go ahead and pack everything up just in case and after putting Kiddo to bed and taking a shower I finally dozed off sometime after midnight. I had lots of contractions throughout the night, though only a few were actually strong enough to wake me up. I did have some interesting dreams though! It's funny how the brain incorporates things like that into dreams.
From about 3:30 AM to about 7 AM the contractions were steady every 12 minutes, though not very strong. When I got up at 7:30 I realized that (TMI ALERT) I had lost a lot of plug and had bloody show. It kind of shocked me because I never had that with Kiddo - so I got pretty excited.
With Kiddo, once labor and contractions began, everything steadily advanced up to delivery.
This morning, after I got up, the contractions pretty much stopped. I was still having them every now and then, but nothing was regular. I was a bit worried though about my blood pressure because with every pump of my heart I could feel the blood surging through my veins. I decided to try to go in for my weekly appointment a bit early, but after fielding calls all morning and trying to get last minute stuff put together I only managed to leave 45 minutes early.
I dropped Kiddo off at my friend's house and headed in to the doctor. Upon arrival I was informed that he was running 45 minutes behind, and of course being 45 minutes early for my appointment I was looking at a long wait. I told the receptionist I was concerned about my blood pressure and asked her if I could just get someone to take a reading. The next thing I know they were taking me back, and I got a room right away. I didn't have to wait long and they checked my blood pressure, which was a bit elevated but not to dangerous levels. The doctor was in shortly after that and after hunting a bit to find the heartbeat he did the check.
No change.
As a matter of fact, I began to feel like a cow as the doctor practically shoved his entire arm up in me to find the baby's head and my cervix.
He told me that the head was down, but the body was still high and lying sort of cross ways. The contractions I had been experiencing had done nothing.
I really was shocked and so very disappointed, so I had to keep from crying as we discussed our options. He went ahead and scheduled an induction for next Wednesday, but I seriously doubt I'll go that long. Never say never, I know.
I asked him if he could sweep the membranes, and he said he was going to try but the position of the baby made it too difficult so that was out.
They hooked me up to the NST monitors and made me sit there for 30 minutes or so. The first 20 minutes the baby didn't move at all. I ate a cereal bar and after a few minutes he was squirming all over the place. Everything checked out just fine.
One the way home I stopped off for a gigantic cheeseburger and chocolate milkshake.
This afternoon I tried to nap a little, but Kiddo was having none of that. This evening I went shopping at Walmart and the grocery store.
Ever since the doctor's visit my contractions have been about 10x stronger than before. A few have really stopped me in my tracks. I am hoping it is the beginning of progress and that the baby will come tomorrow.
We shall see.
I am pretty bummed because I thought I could trust my body to perform similar to the last time, but man, this is totally different.
The night is catching up with me so I will close. I just wanted to update everyone.
Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.
Until,
D :)
Last night I started having contractions. I had a couple around 6:00 and then a couple more around 8:00. I decided to go ahead and pack everything up just in case and after putting Kiddo to bed and taking a shower I finally dozed off sometime after midnight. I had lots of contractions throughout the night, though only a few were actually strong enough to wake me up. I did have some interesting dreams though! It's funny how the brain incorporates things like that into dreams.
From about 3:30 AM to about 7 AM the contractions were steady every 12 minutes, though not very strong. When I got up at 7:30 I realized that (TMI ALERT) I had lost a lot of plug and had bloody show. It kind of shocked me because I never had that with Kiddo - so I got pretty excited.
With Kiddo, once labor and contractions began, everything steadily advanced up to delivery.
This morning, after I got up, the contractions pretty much stopped. I was still having them every now and then, but nothing was regular. I was a bit worried though about my blood pressure because with every pump of my heart I could feel the blood surging through my veins. I decided to try to go in for my weekly appointment a bit early, but after fielding calls all morning and trying to get last minute stuff put together I only managed to leave 45 minutes early.
I dropped Kiddo off at my friend's house and headed in to the doctor. Upon arrival I was informed that he was running 45 minutes behind, and of course being 45 minutes early for my appointment I was looking at a long wait. I told the receptionist I was concerned about my blood pressure and asked her if I could just get someone to take a reading. The next thing I know they were taking me back, and I got a room right away. I didn't have to wait long and they checked my blood pressure, which was a bit elevated but not to dangerous levels. The doctor was in shortly after that and after hunting a bit to find the heartbeat he did the check.
No change.
As a matter of fact, I began to feel like a cow as the doctor practically shoved his entire arm up in me to find the baby's head and my cervix.
He told me that the head was down, but the body was still high and lying sort of cross ways. The contractions I had been experiencing had done nothing.
I really was shocked and so very disappointed, so I had to keep from crying as we discussed our options. He went ahead and scheduled an induction for next Wednesday, but I seriously doubt I'll go that long. Never say never, I know.
I asked him if he could sweep the membranes, and he said he was going to try but the position of the baby made it too difficult so that was out.
They hooked me up to the NST monitors and made me sit there for 30 minutes or so. The first 20 minutes the baby didn't move at all. I ate a cereal bar and after a few minutes he was squirming all over the place. Everything checked out just fine.
One the way home I stopped off for a gigantic cheeseburger and chocolate milkshake.
This afternoon I tried to nap a little, but Kiddo was having none of that. This evening I went shopping at Walmart and the grocery store.
Ever since the doctor's visit my contractions have been about 10x stronger than before. A few have really stopped me in my tracks. I am hoping it is the beginning of progress and that the baby will come tomorrow.
We shall see.
I am pretty bummed because I thought I could trust my body to perform similar to the last time, but man, this is totally different.
The night is catching up with me so I will close. I just wanted to update everyone.
Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.
Until,
D :)
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Go to Sleep
Mmmm, fresh coffee, fresh bottle of creamer, quiet house, these are the moments... :)
Every night when I put Kiddo to bed I tuck him in the covers, put his Lightning McQueen pillow and his Mater pillow wedged between him and the wall and I ask him how his day went. We talk about what he did that day and if it was fun; and sometimes the conversation is long and detailed, sometimes it is short and sweet, but one thing is always the same. No matter if we ran around all day and had lots of fun, or stayed in and did absolutely nothing, he says the day was good.
Sunday night, I was pulling up his covers and stuffing the pillows behind him and before I could even ask he says, "Mommy I have a sad day".
[my heart just shattered into a million little pieces]
I knew his day was not the greatest, but for him to view it as completely sad just wrecked me. I said "you did?" and he said,
"Mommy I cried all through the [church] service. I cried all down the hall to the playground. I cried to my teacher."
I asked him why he cried.
"Cuz that's what I do."
I asked him if he was hurt or mad or sad....why would he cry so much?
"I was sad. Cuz I was"
We talked about it some more. Again I asked him why and if there was anything that I did or Daddy did or if he was hurt. He said no to most of my questions, and stated again that he was just sad.
He did tell me later though that his knees and legs hurt. I'm not sure what to think of that. Just from being on the birth board that I frequent on Babycenter, I know that a lot of the kids are going through "growing pains" right now and complaining of leg pain. And Kiddo is most definitely growing taller (he has absolutely no pants that are long enough right now). BUT, he also sometimes takes on other's pain - if I stub my toe or something he will pretend that he stubbed his toe too. And a couple of days ago he had me on the floor playing tic-tac-toe with him and I complained that my knees and legs hurt from sitting on the floor. So I am not sure that was an actual legitimate complaint from him or a sympathetic reflection of my own aches and pains.
Either way, it was extremely difficult for me to get through his nightly prayer and story without crying. I felt so bad for him. When we prayed, I added into our usual dialogue a request for God to help us have a better day the next day. Kiddo protested at first because in his mind we have to say the exact same thing every night, but for whatever reason suddenly he kind of understood that we can pray different things to God and he settled down and let me finish.
And he fell sound asleep very shortly into the nightly story.
When he goes to sleep, he lays on his side and tucks his little hands, prayer style, under his cheek and chin. He looks just like every storybook child you see illustrated in a sleeping pose. It is the sweetest thing - and some nights I lie there in the dark staring at his sweet cherub face in the glow of the night light. I pray I never forget that sight. I want it burned in my brain forever.
Until,
D :)
Every night when I put Kiddo to bed I tuck him in the covers, put his Lightning McQueen pillow and his Mater pillow wedged between him and the wall and I ask him how his day went. We talk about what he did that day and if it was fun; and sometimes the conversation is long and detailed, sometimes it is short and sweet, but one thing is always the same. No matter if we ran around all day and had lots of fun, or stayed in and did absolutely nothing, he says the day was good.
Sunday night, I was pulling up his covers and stuffing the pillows behind him and before I could even ask he says, "Mommy I have a sad day".
[my heart just shattered into a million little pieces]
I knew his day was not the greatest, but for him to view it as completely sad just wrecked me. I said "you did?" and he said,
"Mommy I cried all through the [church] service. I cried all down the hall to the playground. I cried to my teacher."
I asked him why he cried.
"Cuz that's what I do."
I asked him if he was hurt or mad or sad....why would he cry so much?
"I was sad. Cuz I was"
We talked about it some more. Again I asked him why and if there was anything that I did or Daddy did or if he was hurt. He said no to most of my questions, and stated again that he was just sad.
He did tell me later though that his knees and legs hurt. I'm not sure what to think of that. Just from being on the birth board that I frequent on Babycenter, I know that a lot of the kids are going through "growing pains" right now and complaining of leg pain. And Kiddo is most definitely growing taller (he has absolutely no pants that are long enough right now). BUT, he also sometimes takes on other's pain - if I stub my toe or something he will pretend that he stubbed his toe too. And a couple of days ago he had me on the floor playing tic-tac-toe with him and I complained that my knees and legs hurt from sitting on the floor. So I am not sure that was an actual legitimate complaint from him or a sympathetic reflection of my own aches and pains.
Either way, it was extremely difficult for me to get through his nightly prayer and story without crying. I felt so bad for him. When we prayed, I added into our usual dialogue a request for God to help us have a better day the next day. Kiddo protested at first because in his mind we have to say the exact same thing every night, but for whatever reason suddenly he kind of understood that we can pray different things to God and he settled down and let me finish.
And he fell sound asleep very shortly into the nightly story.
When he goes to sleep, he lays on his side and tucks his little hands, prayer style, under his cheek and chin. He looks just like every storybook child you see illustrated in a sleeping pose. It is the sweetest thing - and some nights I lie there in the dark staring at his sweet cherub face in the glow of the night light. I pray I never forget that sight. I want it burned in my brain forever.
Until,
D :)
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