Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Green Eyed Girl

Ok, so remember a couple of weeks ago I mentioned what Kiddo said to me about having a baby sister?? Well since that conversation he hasn't mentioned it again. I figured it was just a passing thing and haven't really thought much about it.

Well, I do think about having another baby, but not because Kiddo told me it was going to happen.


Tonight as we were driving to Houston, out of the blue (and after a very long stretch of silence from him; man, it must have been like a whole 30 seconds..) Kiddo says,

"Mommy you have a baby in your belly."

[I almost drove off the road]

I do?

"Yes, and it is a girl. I can tell because your belly is growin'."

[thanks a lot Kid.]


Just for the record, my belly is doing anything BUT growing, considering I lot 6 pounds this week, so there. :P

But this whole baby thing is really starting to bug me. It's no secret that I was really hoping Port was a girl. I really want to have a girl - for many reasons, and there are times now (becoming more frequent) that I think about that little girl and I once again mourn for her.

In church last Sunday, we were standing during the music portion. All the lights were down, the praise team was rockin' it, and I was caught up in the music.

Usually during that portion of the service, I am totally focused on the stage and the people in front of me. I don't often see my husband standing next to me - often because I am emotional and trying not to draw attention to the fact that I am crying.

But for a split second this past Sunday, out of the corner of my eye I saw my husband. And in his arms was a little baby girl with dark brown hair and green eyes.

And it took my breath away.

Of course, there was no baby girl. It was a figment of my imagination. A vision perhaps. A dream.

But for a moment she was there, and she was real and she was beautiful.

And it took all my strength to stand there and pretend to sing through the tears.



Heather said...

You know what I think?

I think you need to get yourself an HPT and go POS.

That is some trippy, trippy stuff.

Julia said...

Are you SURE that you're not pregnant?

Leslie said...

I really want you to be pregnant, you so deserve whatever it is that you want :) You would be so wonderful with a little girl and then she would have two big brothers to watch out for her.

Rachel Anne said...

How did I miss this post, girl?

Crying at Hallmark commercials was always a sure sign I was pregnant. Are you SURE you aren't?

Any way you slice it, that was a lovely vision.

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