So Hubby just informed me that his company did another round of layoffs (that's round 5 people) and a pay cut across the board (5% Joy). Thankfully Hubby still has a job, but a pay cut??!? Lord, I don't know what we are going to do now. We are barely making it as it is and we are still $300 in the hole each month when I factor in our annual property taxes (no, we do not have escrow on our mortgage account).
So a lot of you know that my birthday is coming up on Thursday, and I have a very strong feeling it's going to be absolutely horrible in some way. Call me psychic, call me psychotic, whatever, but I do not want to even acknowledge it. I have a feeling it is going to be something like my 30th - if any of you recall, I got fired from my job a few days before my 30th birthday because they found out I was pregnant with Kiddo, and therefore was "not a team player". uh huh.
So anyway, I really don't want to "celebrate" my birthday - it's not the age or anything, it's just our circumstances. I don't want to get my hopes up daydreaming about any kind of celebrating or dinner out or pampering of any sort because it just isn't going to happen. I'm not trying to throw a pity party either - I am just trying to be practical. If I treat it like any other day then I won't be tempted to spend any money. Right? Right.
So yeah, I am going to be 35 - it doesn't seem real. I think part of my problem is that I've been on Facebook so much lately, talking to "old" friends and thinking about things that happened 15-20 years ago...I am back in that young adult mind frame again (sort of). Then I look at pictures of my family and I think, "how the heck did that happen? Look what I did!" lol. It's a strange feeling for sure. Even more strange is seeing people I went to high school with that have kids that are or are almost teenagers! My boys are still so young, and some of my friends are preparing their kids for the high school years already (and a couple for college! yikes!). I just can't imagine it.
I still feel like in many ways I am just starting out. Like this is just the beginning. When will I feel like I am in the middle of it?
When will this headache go away?